Virtual Negotiation

Whilst negotiating remotely is not a new phenomenon, it has become a much bigger part of the negotiator’s life since the pandemic has been with us. There are some potential difficulties and downsides to remote negotiation, as well as a few upsides, and so it’s important to think through the issues and then adjust our behaviours accordingly.

A useful structure to refer to here is the Media-Richness Continuum.

Email relies almost exclusively on words; for telephone we can add in voice characteristics (tone, pace, volume); for video conferencing, add visual inputs. With email, there’s a delay before response, hence asynchronous; telephone and video conferencing usually require an immediate response, hence synchronous. (I’m not going to address texting or instant messaging in this article because they’re quite rarely used for all but the simplest negotiations. However, most of the comments relating to emails relate to texting/instant messaging as well.)

Albert Mehrabian’s famous research tells us that words represent just 7% of perceived meaning against 38% for voice characteristics and 55% for body language. The precise applicability of these findings to the context of negotiation is debated but we can safely assume that voice characteristics and body language are significantly impactful to people’s perception of the meaning of a message. Of course, when we’re emailing there is a complete absence of these clues to meaning. On the phone we have the benefit of voice but we are still missing the important input of body language. Even video conferencing does not provide the full body-language experience.

So, there’s plenty of scope for misunderstanding when we communicate remotely. Furthermore, research confirms that building rapport and trust tends to lead to better negotiated outcomes (see Leigh Thompson reference below): it’s more difficult to build rapport and trust by phone and much more difficult by email.

What can we do about these potential downsides? Well, here are a few hacks, first of all for negotiating by email.

• Review emails before sending them; put yourself in their shoes and assume a high propensity for misunderstanding.
• For important emails, perhaps “sleep on it” thereby bringing a fresh mind to the task next day.
• Whilst many of us seek to keep written communication short, sometimes, particularly when communicating with someone from a different culture, we may need to explain our meaning in a bit more depth.
• Misunderstanding cuts both ways so try not to take offence too easily and give your counterpart the benefit of the doubt.

And for telephone:

• When using the phone, in addition to the words that we choose, our voice characteristics: tone, pace and volume, are hugely impactful. So, think about what message you want to convey and then how you might be coming across.

By the way, it’s likely that your facial expression – angry, happy, critical and so on – will affect how your message is perceived by the other person. There is some basis for this hypothesis in Facial Feedback Theory. If you want to come across in a certain way, wear the appropriate expression!

• Be aware of the other person’s environment. If you want them to concentrate, to give you their full attention, to be calm, probably best to agree a time in advance so that they can take your call in a quiet office. I remember a few years ago trying to explain my proposal to someone who was walking through Stanley Market in Hong Kong – lots of raises voices, scooters, him trying to cross the road… I suspect his evident irritation was only partly due to my proposal!

• Similarly, if you’re negotiating with someone in a different time-zone, bear in mind their situation. 11 a.m. may be a perfect time for you but your counterpart in Kuala Lumpur may be tired and annoyed by your interruption to their evening.

• At the start of a call, take time to engage in rapport-building: perhaps talking about the weather, family, golf, the general business environment and so on. For some cultures, engaging in this way is absolutely critical. The same point applies to negotiating by email but is usually best done briefly: perhaps something like: “I hope you enjoyed your ski holiday. I hear the snow in the Alps has been great this year.”

It’s worth noting the results of an experiment carried out by Professor Leigh Thompson of Kellogg School of Management.

“We had people negotiate via email, and we gave them a week to do it.  I mean, they had all the time, it was unrestricted.  Send as many messages as you want, and the only twist was, some people were told to have a five-minute, non-business phone conversation with their, quote, opponent before this weeklong negotiation started. You can talk about anything except the business matter that you will be engaging in.

And it was amazing.  That five minutes of schmoozing, which served no purpose except socializing, completely greased the wheels for more collaborative interactions, more trust in the other party, and of course, the economic indicators were absolutely astounding.  A significantly greater percentage of people were able to reach an agreement, and among those who reached an agreement, the people who had, quote, schmoozed, reached much better deals in terms of a win/win metric.”

Video-conferencing has recently become ubiquitous and, no doubt, its prevalence will be maintained at some level beyond the pandemic. We need to be adept at operating in this medium. It seems to have it all: words, voice and visual but actually it’s not as media-rich as face-to-face. The visual aspect is constrained, usually to the upper torso and face, and it seems to be more difficult to pick up subtle body language through the filter of a camera. Furthermore, for me, it’s more difficult to pick up visual clues when negotiating with a group of people – peripheral vision doesn’t work as well.

One of the issues affecting rapport and trust-building is the lack of eye contact because people tend to look at the screen rather than the camera; and eye contact is important to rapport and trust, even if its impact is subliminal. (Tricky one to solve as we have to look at the screen to see the actions and reactions of our counterpart! But see the hacks below.)

As with the telephone, you’re never quite sure who else is involved in the conference – out of shot. This isn’t always a problem, but it can be. As a general rule it’s helpful to know who’s listening and possibly contributing to the interaction. And if you are going to involve someone else surreptitiously, remember that it can be obvious to the other side, even on the phone, and if they are aware, it will rapidly dissipate trust.

And then there are the technical problems which drive us all to distraction. Incompetence with the technology can negatively affect how people feel about you – and your own confidence and concentration.

With video-conferencing, we are not getting the “full experience” but it’s better than email and phone, certainly in terms of understanding the intended message and, to some extent, for rapport-building. Here are a few hacks to make the most of it.

• As with face-to-face, think about how you want to come across: facial expressions, posture, your clothes etc.
• Think about the position and proximity of the camera, the background and the lighting particularly if you wish to be seen as professional and competent.
• Control your environment. (Having a young child burst into the room shouting “Mummy!” or “Daddy!” may be helpful in respect of rapport-building but the timing and audience have to be right: it’s a move which should be attempted only by top-flight tacticians!)
• If you’re responsible for setting up the video-conference, do make sure you know what you are doing; and if you don’t, try to have a techie involved who does. Even if you are just a participant you need to be competent with the functionality of the platform.
• Be aware that others may be listening in and the conference may be being recorded without your knowledge
• When you’re in rapport or trust-building modes, consider looking at the camera, at least at the appropriate moments.
• As with any medium, team discipline is vital. Everyone should understand their role and when they are allowed to speak: perhaps, for example, only when asked to by the team leader or main speaker.

Thus far we have only considered potential downsides to negotiating remotely but there are potential upsides.

• Remote negotiations are convenient: there’s no travelling time and cost.
• Negotiating by email allows time for considered responses and this is likely to mean better, perhaps less emotional responses – which can be particularly helpful if the situation is acrimonious.
• If you find yourself in a relatively weak position, for whatever reason, there is evidence to suggest that remote negotiation can lead to better outcomes.
• Negotiation by email leaves a paper trail – useful if there is any dispute about what has been stated or proposed.
• If you are dealing with a tricky counterpart, email can be beneficial as most people will think twice about telling barefaced lies in writing: it’s there in black and white, it’s difficult to deny and could probably be used in a court of law.

Finally, bear in mind that substance is even more important in remote negotiations. Think carefully about your proposals, your justifications and your stated views with this in mind. The “front” that might be helpful in face-to-face situations is probably not going to cut it on the phone – perhaps not even in video conference – and certainly not by email. E-charisma is different to P-charisma (where P = physical)!